FOUR people were wounded today when random acts of violence broadcast during a marathon showing of Tom and Jerry cartoons on local Fox affiliate WJW Channel 8 were emulated by local youths, police said.

The violence occurred as hundreds of children pelted innocent bystanders with boulders, bowling balls, various sharp objects including scissors and oversized pitchforks, and a large hornet's nest in the town of Minerva outside the Cleveland metro area, a local police official said.  One person was injured when children dumped a wheelbarrow full of wet cement, hardening him into a pose reminiscent of Rodin's "The Thinker". 

He said it was unclear whether the children or the victims understood the gravity of the situation.  The official said police reinforcements had been called in from neighboring towns. "The situation is now under control".

Five people declined treatment after being stung by hornets emerging from a nest tossed like a football into the Shades of Summer tanning salon as a result of the cartoons, broadcast all week, that have spawned an epidemic of blunt trauma injuries across the county. 

		Sylvia Koslowski receives medical care after being flattened by a rolling pin hurled at her head

About 10 people reported bear traps set in heavily trafficked areas to police in Pekin overnight.  Residents have been warned to check above doors for pails filled with paint, glue, molasses, and icy water. Parents are also being asked to secure wooden mallets, bowling balls, and axes in an effort to forestall any further incidents.

Yesterday Tom Kishman, a local merchant, and his followers offered rewards amounting to more than $100 to anyone who surrendered an item that could potentially be used in cartoon violence. "I had no idea just how many household items were suitable for cartoon violence," he said, "it's almost like people are cleaning out their attics and turning in junk. Knitting needles, old framed photographs of dead relatives, a box of newspapers? Maybe if you dropped it on someone from real high up.  Hell, anything can be used for cartoon violence. I'll be broke before I'm finished buying up everyone's trash.  I should have thought about this a little more before I put up my own money..."

On the same day, Cleveland decided to temporarily close all hardware stores and urged its citizens to lock their tool sheds as soon as possible.

Cartoon violence in Minerva has taken on a distinctly anti-cat tone.  Many attacks were precipitated by a minor provocation which caused the ultimate victim to chase after the attacker, leading him into an even more calamitous situation - a common story line in Tom and Jerry cartoons. In addition to "hot-foots" and steel bear traps, children used a tall sapling to make a snare trap that snatched long-time Minerva resident Chuck Anguish high into the air.  Mr Anguish was left suspended, upside-down by his ankle, for over 45 minutes.

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